Somewhere between the end of 2012 and the beginning of 2013, I had one the worst moments of my life. Everything was going downhill, I almost lost a dear person because of suicide as I managed to stop him in the last moments, then problems at home, it was terrible. I actually lost it one point and cried in the corner of my room, because the pressure was too much for me. Never cried so hard before, and I had no one by my side when I most needed. Because of that, I got angry and depressed and it effected the people around me. I was arrogant, selfish, I hated everyone and ranted on everyone. Because of that, I lost a girl that I cared about. It’s my fault for everything that happened and I deserve all the bad things I received. Some people forgive d me for what Ive done, because they knew what is going on. But I lost the girl I liked, because of my stupid arrogant behavior. I will understand if she won’t forgive me, because I don’t deserve her forgiveness. Deep in my heart, I know I’m not a bad person, never was, but because I let my anger take the better of me, I got what I deserved. I learned a lot of things and I’m sorry to everyone that I caused pain. Also don’t know if she ever will check my blog, but I just want to tell her this:

I cared about you, I liked everything about you and I was ready to sacrifice a lot things to be with you. But I messed up, and I’m sorry for everything Ive did. People might though that you’re not for me, but I didn’t cared what they said, I accepted you for whom you are. I never meant to hurt you, because I cared about you. I still do. You don’t have to forgive me, because I don’t deserve forgiveness from you. But I just want you to know, Im sorry for everything Ive did. I believe you will find a better person than me and I wish you well. Thank you for the amazing moments you gave me. Hope you will do well.

A message to others: thank you for those people who stood by my side even though I was angry at you for no reason. Thank you for everything